The computer said the password was too short. The husband made his password “my dick,” and his wife fell on the floor laughing.
What do you call a useless piece of skin on a penis?.Who’s there? Some! Some who? Some dickhead talking to a knock knock joke. Then the librarian told me to take it out. My penis was in the Guinness Book of World Records.What’s the difference between your jokes and your penis?īut the holes in the dialer were too small.The pirate replies, “YARR, It’s driving me nuts!” “Isn’t that uncomfortable?” asks the bartender. A pirate walks into a bar with a wheel attached to the front of his pants.Melt them, turn them into a tire and call it a Goodyear. What do you do with a year’s worth of used condoms?.They’re always popping up at inopportune times, and they deserve a good beating.
What do you call a bunny with a crooked dick?.
I guess it’s because his name is Matthew. My boss told me to stop shortening his name to Dick.What do you call a self-centered penis?.But please don’t whip it out in public and start waving it around. It’s OK to have them, just don’t shove them down people’s throats. What do you call a penis on a beach getaway?.Why did the battleship need a deep clean?.What do you call a man with three legs?ĭo you have a boner to pick with me or something?.It gets hard for no reason, and it is much too short. Where does the penis get his workout outfit?.What fruit is good for your sperm count?.What did Cinderella do when she got to the ball?.What does the sign on a closed brothel say?.The right knee, the left knee, and the wee knee. Did you know that men have three knees?.What happened to the man who built a penis out of LEGOs?.
The teacher comes back and says, “Hey! Zip down, Dick out, and Pea in the corner!” The teacher leaves the room and Zip gets on top of her desk, Dick goes inside a cabinet, and Pea runs out the window and waves. There are three naughty boys in a classroom: Zip, Dick, and Pea.“How did you guess that?” “You told me yesterday,” Edna replied. He pulls down his pants, and she looks and says, “You’re 88.” “Wow,” he says. Old Edna at the nursing home tells old Harry that if he shows her his penis, she can tell him his age.To make sure the dicks get knocked off the smart ones. Why does the doctor smack babies on the butt after they are born?.What did the elephant say to the naked man?.What’s the insensitive part at the end of the penis called again?īecause they only have that tiny hole in their penis to get oxygen to their brain.Wife: “You have the biggest penis out of all your friends.” Husband: “I bet you can’t say something that will make me both happy and sad at the same time.”.Why doesn’t the rooster wear underwear?.How do you compliment someone on performing a circumcision?.And if that weren’t enough, he regularly takes a beating. Not only are his closest friends nuts, but his backdoor neighbor’s an asshole. RELATED: Considering Circumcision? What To Know About Circumcision Care Now that all the puns are out of the way, enjoy these hilarious, perfectly raunchy dick jokes. You’ll feel cocky when you tell them and get your audience laughing hard. You probably can’t whip these out at work, but your bestie and cool family members will be all ears. So if you’re looking to laugh at a dirty joke, we have the funnies for you. Bringing the male membrane into a gag is always hilarious. When it comes to dick jokes, quality doesn’t matter. RELATED: These Funny Comebacks And Insults Are What Our Minds Are Really Made Of These dick jokes, puns, and one-liners are just the tip of the laughter iceberg. So we’ve gone ahead and rounded up the best ones out there. And, truly, is there anything more juvenile than a good dick joke? Nope. No matter your age, it’s good to check maturity at the door sometimes, and just laugh at juvenile things.